Girlfriend Therapy

Egads! With just 11 days left in Shanghai to go, my BFF from college, Shelli, said to me, "Girlfriend, we have to take you shopping!" The last thing I wanted to do was shop, not when I have to pack. And let's not forget the manuscript I haven't picked up in the last three weeks. But Shel was not to be deterred. She pointed out: you have Christmas presents to buy. Yeah, yeah, I thought.

But then there's my mentor, Janet Wong, who kicked me in the pants with a well-worded email: We, the few remaining readers of your blog, are tired of your self-help induced, quasi-inspirational posts. Show us Shanghai. That's all we care about. (Okay, okay, that was my translation of her email.)

So to Taikang Lu we went. This is a rehabbed neighborhood turned enclave for boutiques, coffeeshops, restaurants and galleries. Wouldn't you know it? Who do we see on our first stop at Nest--a wonderful boutique? The amazing Francine Martin--professional shopper and purveyor of the finest goods and one of my first Shanghai turnSTYLE interviews! I was so thrilled to see Francine who was yet again absolutely exquisitely divinely decked out. She was In Action with a lucky client.

After another stop at June Woo--THE place to go for cashmere scarves--Shel and I dropped in on Ginger for some sustenance. The score? Shel checked off 3 people from her Christmas list. All my peeps are still present-less.

Today I am thankful for the sheer joy of SERENDIPITY. It completely floors me that out of all the millions and million and millions of people in Shanghai, I actually bumped into ONE person I know. I love that. It makes me feel as though I have established a community of my own in this big huge city, so far from home.

Shanghai | turnSTYLE: Francine Martin, Shanghai Savant

turn·stile –noun
1. a structure of four horizontally revolving arms pivoted atop a post and set in a gateway or opening in a fence to allow the controlled passage of people.


turn·STYLE - noun
1. Justina's snapshot profiles of cool people in Shanghai who are creating and defining China style.


Let's just face it. There are some people who are cooler than we can ever dream to be. Those who ooze style and hipness, regardless of age, regardles of what's "in," regardless of what magazines deem beautiful and au currant. Even more impressive are those hipsters who can be chic even while wearing Naots. (Which are kissing cousins of Birkenstocks, yes?)

See, chic?

Meet Francine Martin, woman of many talents beyond being effortlessly cool: editor, model, professional expat, and Shanghai's most savvy savant who knows the ins and outs of what's hot and hopping in our city shops. After making her home in Asia for the last 25 years, she's sharing her vast insider info

with discriminating shoppers via her East of the Sun treasure-finding excursions.

I had to meet the woman herself after reading about Francine in a recent round-up of the Shanghai shopping scene in The New Yorker. As Patty Marx wrote in her article:

"The tailor whipped up a snappy little dress to Mai’s specifications and delivered
it to my hotel three days later. I wore it to an appointment with Francine
Martin, an American who leads shopping tours of Shanghai, to sites recondite and
renowned (www.eastofthesun-asia.com). “Thirty-three dollars?”she said. “Very
nice, but one should never pay more than twenty dollars for a simple custom-made
dress.” (Stall 237 also makes men’s shirts of Egyptian cotton for $15, but Martin probably knows where they can be had for $10.)"

If Chris Buckley (Shanghai turnSTYLE, volume 1, September 12) is right, and we're all collectors of something or another in Shanghai, then Francine's the kind of person I want to collect in my life: she's smart and creative and curious. Full of life. And adventurous. Way adventurous. She's the woman I'd beeline to at a cocktail party simply because of the way she carries herself. In an instant, I'd know: this is a woman who has a story to tell!

Am I right or am I right?

Francine doesn't just live in Shanghai. She lives in the Old Town of Shanghai, calling home one of the historic lilongs. After meeting me at the entrance of her lilong, Francine took me on a quick walking tour of its alleys, pointing out the art deco and traditional features of the buildings. (Families used to have their names carved above their doors.) She simply could not help but share the beauty of her neighborhood.

We took two steps--not even enough time for me to grab my notebook and pen!--before she introduced me to the lifeblood of her neighborhood: the communal sinks (many people don't have running water),


the neighborhood dumpling guy,
the rice vendor outside her door.


And then, welcome to my idea of nirvana: Francine's well-curated abode.




All the details in her home captured her traveling and treasure-spotting spirit--from her collection of delicate teapots to the outdoor courtyard. Where, incidentally, she had set the most charming spread of pastries and tea. I was so touched. And felt so taken care of, which I think must be one of the key reasons why Francine excels at what she does. She makes you feel cherished and assured that you are getting the best of the best.

And that's why (I have to admit) I read her ming pian (business card) and shook my head: "Francine, you aren't a personal shopper. This is just wrong." I can be so rude, can't I? But I felt like I had been catching up with a longtime girlfriend, and we girlfriends are nothing if not honest with each other.

Her eyes gleamed--thankfully in agreement. "I put together creative outings, that's really what I do. I get a vicarious pleasure from giving people an experience or showing them an item they had no idea existed in the world."

Whether you're a knitting aficianado on the lookout for the finest cashmere yarn or an eco-traveler who yearns for a foldable bicycle, Francine is the one to call. (Those people have, in fact, called on Francine.) She's got the research chops from years of being an editor (that's called fact-checking for people not in publishing!). And she's got the connections from living here for decades. And best of all, she's got the negotiating chops. I was so relieved when she eyed my purse, and after I told her what I paid for it, she nodded approvingly: "I'd say you did very well."

What would I say to that? I'd say that I would entrust my own mom and mother-in-law and my best girlfriends with Francine. I would give them time with Francine as a gift. And that is high praise.



Coordinates:
Francine Martin
East of the Sun
http://www.eastofthesun-asia.com/
francine@eastofthesun-asia.com

Happy Mid-Autumn Festival to You!

Zhong Qiu Jie Kwaile! And that would be Happy Mid-Autumn Festival.

Today is the second most important Chinese holiday in the year--the first being January's Lunar New Year. This holiday is all about family: coming together, feasting together, gazing upon the moon together. Today, however, my hubby took off for the airport, and masses of utterly dark clouds are masking the sun as I type. So I'm a little skeptical about the moon making an appearance in a few hours.

Still, there are so many people to celebrate in our new home. If there's one thing living abroad, both here in China and years before in Australia, has taught me, it's this: each of us can create community and family. We can find people to connect with. Our kindred spirits. Our home away from home.

So here in our first 4 weeks in China, these are the people I am grateful for:

First, there's my college BFF, Shelli, who lives ten minutes away from me. (My other ones live in SF... Kelly and Drew, where are you?!) Shel calls me every day to see how things are going. She lets me crash at her house, just minutes away from my kids' school. She tells me about all the places to go... The organic market every Friday morning from 7:30 a.m.-9:00 a.m. just a 10 minute walk away from my home.

And those places to avoid....

Second, there are the people who are taking care of us here. My husband's driver is at the top of the list. (My hubby's company won't let us drive here since the liability is so high; instead, like so many expats, he was given a driver.) Mr. Zhang is our hero. Literally. If there is one SAFE driver in all of Shanghai, he's the man.

A couple of days ago, his sister asked him to meet The Boyfriend. So I bought Mr. Zhang a little packet of French cookies to take to The Meeting of the Boyfriend. And the next day? Mr. Zhang gave me an enormous, beautifully packaged box of mooncakes. Egads! Mooncakes are hugely important here: they are symbols of your esteem for people. They tell people that you care. And that you think they have meaning in your life. This has been weighing on me. For days and days. Even before Mr. Zhang preempted me with his box o' mooncakes.

What mooncakes were worthy of Mr. Zhang who audibly gasps when I open my own door, who races out with the umbrella so not one drop of rain drips on my children's precious heads, who practices Mandarin with me even though I am probably insulting him unknowingly by using the wrong tones? So yesterday, in the middle of a typhoon-esque deluge, I sprinted through fat raindrops to get the man his mooncakes, while my hubby goodnaturedly trotted along, asked me, "Is this really necessary?"

Ummm...not necessary, but mandatory. I had to get his driver the Porsche of all mooncakes:

(Yes, Shelli told me These were The Mooncakes to get.) I would have taken a picture of the massive outpost filled with racks and racks of these mooncakes, but my camera would have drowned in the rain. But the important thing? Mission accomplished. Mr. Zhang was moved to tears.

Third, there is the family we left behind who we hope are coming to visit (hint, hint). My mom loves Buddha statues and has been eyeing them for years without buying a single one for herself. So the first thing I bought on my recent shopping expedition?

Not one, but two Buddhas for my mom's garden and meditation room. And then, there's my mother-in-law who is also an artist. I have already started stockpiling beautiful art supplies for her artwork.

Fourth, there are my new friends. Like my awesome neighbor, Pam, who took me under her wing and said, "Girl, we must take you shopping because you have nothing in your house." Shopping Pam-style is efficient because she knows exactly what she wants (the concubine seat above) and where to go (Angel & Tony's Antique Shop manufacturing site, among others).

We saw, we bargained, we bought...and a few hours later, the furniture was delivered. For free. From shop to home in three hours. Now, that's something you don't see in the states.
As cool and appealing as this cart was, I had to leave it at the store since it's just about the size of my home in Seattle. But couldn't this could be my daughter's bedroom? Do you think?

And then there's my new peep, Francine Martin, the Shanghai Savant who knows ALL about Shanghai hotspots.She inspired me to imbibe the city--in all of its beauty and ugliness as embodied by its plethora of...mops. (More on Francine soon, I promise. Whether I continue my photomontage of mops as Francine encouraged is to be determined.)

And fifth, there are my adventurous kids and hubby. I love traveling with them, visiting new places, learning new things together. My daughter didn't have school two days ago, so we had one of our Adventure Days. First, we zipped over to the South Bund Soft-Spinning Material Market (better known as The Fabric Market)...so we could finish off her fantasy canopy bed. I must be getting inured to the massiveness that is China because we sailed through the multiple floors and countless stalls of fabric without completely shutting down. And with my new negotiating skills (bu xing! impossible!), I bought 20 meters of tulle for the price of two American lattes. Then it was off to the Cricket and Bird Market where my daughter in all her cute nine-year-old-ness masterfully negotiated for two pet turtles: Oogey and Yertle.
(They're in there somewhere, but don't ask me where. So much for my writerly observation skills.)

One note about this market. If mooncakes are big business once a year, then crickets are an industry year round. These aren't just pets. These are little emperors with wings and antennas. They have their own beautifully carved boxes. And these? They're plates and dishes for the bugs. I screamed (by accident) when one shop vendor thoughtfully opened up a box so that I could take a photo. I just hadn't realized he was going to shove the cricket right up to my lens. All the men laughed. I did, too. Sheepishly. And then I forgot to snap the picture and was too embarrassed to ask him to open the lid again.

And finally, I am thankful for YOU, my peeps who are reading this blog and offering me support. My writer-pals! My readergirlz. Lots of people who've lived in or are living in China. And even a reader from Uganda! Thank you.

Tonight, I'll take a nibble of one of my mooncakes from Mr. Zhang, and let the sweetness of my friend and family fill me.